An email pops into my inbox. Writing down thoughts is SO helpful for me. No hangover. I am a scientist with ADHD, working a government job, also live in southern California. Now I’m thinking maybe I should look further into this. Mi see clear It just can be so inconvenient at times and less often down right debilitating. You have many superhuman talents. Now you really want to interact with the world: talk, joke, flirt, smile but instead you’re just watching through a one way glass window, desperately wishing someone could see your smile. Why , even though I can add subtract ..count just fine ..do I have to be in a quiet area to count down a drawer ? Education and jobs are important but so to are friends, family, a lover, pursing your interests, not being stuck in dead-end sole-less inflexible jobs that drain much of your time and energy. They probably think I’m not listening to them.” Then we had our third child a son in 2002. Define your own. Here’s a visual of what understeering looks like: The next ADHD analogy was posted anonymously on Quora, but it’s the one I probably identify with most. I’ve had more years of serious depression than years without it. My partner knows not to put a meal out for me. My wife puts every little thing I do that supports her idea that my energy or excitement is ADHD based in a pile that she’s declared is bad behaviour. Or the one that seems to bother me is that I am was to high energy for her. I look forward to hearing it, and saying hello. When you are in a foreign country, you’re usually wondering what’s going on. to bad the A.I wants to play a game and the whole time you’re studying its off in the background doing everything but helping you retain the information. Find a way to exploit them. It was important. I was diagnosed in my late 20s (I’m now in my early 40s), and this is really the first time I feel like there are other people out there who get it. Gets fired from nearly every job or has problems with co-workers. I would love to hear more examples. I really appreciate all the many insightful comments. It’s frustrating when you have to work harder than usual to complete a simple task. I sit on my own slot for the quietness. I am 55 year old woman recently diagnosed. Some people don’t have ADHD but may have symptoms similar or which overlap with ADHD. My brain never takes the same road twice. My partner says it’s 4 pm time to stop work and relax but my brain says I have an idea let’s get to it now! I could say so much more but so could many others guess I’m just venting and having a bad night. I couldn’t focus on this tense energy just rely on everything happening around me to be vines that would each take a turn keeping me from falling. I wanted to find out exactly how a person with ADHD thinks and feels, and there were so many wonderful answers, from real people, describing their world in stunning detail. I’ve also been doing meditation on-and-off the past 15 years and it hasn’t helped much either. On the one hand, it’s good to have an explanation for the scatteredness of my head, but on the other hand, I’m terrified that I’ll never be able to change. These drugs act on your dopamine levels which are transmitters from one cell to another. You can communicate dryly, like tapping out messages in code for those on the other side to hear. So if you’re asking yourself “does he like me” and you’re finding your man cryptically impossible to read, this is the guide for you. It’s like having a hundred tvs on all at the same time, on different channels, on medium to low volume. As a child my mom would always say “you’re leaving a trail” for example, doing my homework, and I get thirsty. I have my BA and MBA however, I have trouble holding a job because of my zoning out and hyper focus. There’s a part of me that hesitates when setting a goal. We worry so much about mundane, normal stuff that we just lose it and freak out about everything at once, often by making bad decisions. I go to grab the juice jug and abandon the stuffed animal on the top shelf of the fridge. Attempting to solve a person… where no solution of my design will ever fit, no matter how well crafted it is, or how convincingly I’ve captured every corner case, or won the debate on paper… is pointless… because people, are not problems to be solved… some things cannot be understood or seen. I just see a shiny new squirell and chase it all while trying to figure out where i left my effing coffee cup. I will be sitting in a classroom and if I lose my focus, I am losing that focus for the rest of class. She has seen so many psychologists and a few psychiatrists and medication providers and was diagnosed with ADHD by 3 more doctors after that. And I told her that because I never had any issues when I was younger, the option ‘ADHD’ had always been swept off the table. I tried to go to college and had to drop out due to an illness. I get to Amazon and get distracted by soooo many colorful and exciting products, I completely forget why I came here in the first place. I really need to get things done, but I am locked in. The sudden unexpected jolt, brings the ride to a sudden holt. Am I even gonna finish THIS project? you can’t focus on one thing At a time and you don’t even realize it. ADD or ADHD can be very lonely. I’m going to leave it at that, and try to finish an essay that is due tonight that I’ve put off writing for weeks. So how do I make her understand that? Ever used an old Macbook with an outdated operating system and tried opening more than one application at a time? I find other ways to accomplish tasks. I struggle every day it’s hard to focus its hard to stay on one task. I cant stand when people say this is a made up disorder, they don’t take the time to really try and learn how it affects my daily life. I have fun, then in my head “chill dude, wtf? I raised my hand to answer. What its actually doing though is causing paralysis in my mind and only enforcing the cycle of learned helplessness. I was told on several occasions that I would never make it in life, college was out of the question and I should be grateful I was attractive. Instead of focusing on looking straight ahead I’m focusing on everything. I find myself in the kitchen with a pair of socks. I am 47. I don’t want to NOT follow through. For example – I’m an Architect (fast paced, complex, chaotic, never ending learning) and tried to work in the corporate commercial sector because the money is better but struggled to care enough to work for people who typically presented as narcissistic jerks. It is like my thoughts are on turbocharge most of the time. Pretty sure that’s what the inside of my brain looks like. I have a fast rebound also . I’ve never met anyone who is better at researching and finding solutions to things, and most of my closest friends and colleagues would concur. It’s like watching all your mistakes through a screen. How hard is it for me to tell my partner ii don’t want to go with him be it shopping or day trip . Later, someone asks SpongeBob what his name is and in his brain the tiny SpongeBobs are running around frantically, desperately searching for a name. I graduated in the early 2000s from HS with honours. In the long run, I think it’s great, but people don’t understand why and they get frustrated why it takes me longer to do things sometimes. I want so badly to start finishing things. I really found this article relatable even though i pretty much miss the last few sentences in almost every paragraph due to those annoying little “share bubbles that cover the corners(facebook,twitter etc..) i would love to remove them and read the entire thing but i know that if i try it will lead to my branching off into five other things…(ADHD in full glory can steal an entire day with a few poorly placed bubbles…). I’m always missing bit and pieces of conversations and television shows without realizing that I’m not following or hearing correctly. I’m still in the grief and anger stages about late Dx. I zone out so easily it’s scary. While reading, I searched about supermassive blackholes (because i’m fascinated about astronomy that and my brain wanted to..), then I searched about LIGO and gravitational waves (because wikipedia lead me to..), then I searched about Nolan latest movie “Dunkirk” (between Kip Thorne is on wiki page and he worked with Nolan), then I searched about Weinstein because I read a beef between Rose and Meryl because it attracted my eyes on side “ad” articles and finally after reading all of this. (Gifted people are way harder on themselves.-I’ve got one of those as well) Medication alone can’t solve the problem it has to be a two part approach. Aaaahhhhhhh But yeah–apparently, everyone’s favourite go-to remark is oh, it must be perfectionism or ADHD, etc. (Not saying that people with ADHD are never in distress–but the causes are not entirely the same). I’m determined, I’m loyal and hard working, kind, creative, a team player, isolated- singled out, ‘m sensitive, I’m secretly critically depressed. Glad yours was short! In a typical day having ADHD (haven’t used medication since undergraduate almost 4 years ago). Things are still tornadic, but the F5 is more like an F2. When you hear about a disorder, you can’t help it. You need a new psychiatrist because if he knew what he was doing, he’d also know it wouldn’t have the addictive properties for you. Overall I do not like the person I am Unmedicated. Plus sometimes I feel as if my head is going everywhere and I can’t focus on one thing, as I get panicky, so if someone were to talk to me I would not be able to answer them sanely as I wasn’t focusing, but then again I feel I can only remember these things at the time, but if someone were to ask me to recall I wouldn’t know like I feel this happens sometimes maybe rarely but maybe I also just can’t remember? I think my “anxiety” is actually a coping mechanism for functioning in daily life, especially as a female who has always been expected to do well and be “perfect.” I realize that I use fear (anxiety) to artificially motivate myself to do things I consider dull; this gets extremely exhausting. His counselor told him in a meeting that he has a choice of what he focuses on and that doesn’t really sit well with me. He was diagnosed at age 8. I’ll one up that last one a tad… “Why does every road seem new to me every time I am on it?” I HAVE to force myself to keep this short… I could go full-adder-tangential on this topic. How can you juggle 40 things on a unicycle on a tightrope with 800 tabs open on your computer and not be able to find your keys or your wallet or remember where you were going and then be expected to be productive? I am a terrible prioritizer, can’t find a job (because of COVID), and feel more and more lost every day. Because I’ve learned I’m hopeless.) The brilliance lies in the attempt… My ADHD benefits these valued characteristics of mine so much, and I would not want to trade it for anything. When I’m angry I get yelling and even after I say (yell) what I needed to get out I keep going and going. A wonderful gift. That really helps me create space to get focused work done. ADHD feels like everything is happening all at once and all of a sudden you forget everything because it happens way too fast. The worst part is when I got a little older I wanted to pay attention and I would sit in class and try… but before I new it I was spacing out with different stories or theories in my brain. But every day I have to choose: which personality will lead to fulfilment: “chaotic social lovely adhd” or “zombified laser focus efficiency”? !” . It’s worrying all the time but not meaning to. I just “can’t even”. I try not to take things too seriously. But then you realize what you’re doing and make them look back at the first thing in the middle. Something that could have been really bad news and I knew he was nervous. WTF. I was diagnosed with ADHD at 60 When you call my name It's like a little prayer I'm down on my knees I want to take you there In the midnight hour I can feel your power Just like a prayer You know I'll take you there. Take me to your river I wanna know. I set a timer for 25 mins. But that’s because those people who don’t have ADHD are in distress! we often try harder than the people around us to achieve ordinary goals but still fall behind. Driving with the emergency brake on is such a great analogy. Was participating in Coahing and ADHD skills classes, then just dropped it. It was important. Was it positive or negative? I told him it’s like being plopped in the middle of a track race except for you the lines are removed, the track clay’s replaced with an ice rink, and you’re expected to know what to do. Written off for choosing a pity party or lazy or worse assigned some other mental illness to find everyone thinks they know or I’m just not worth it to have any credet for anything I ever was or had said , and just too far gone but more invisible every day I live and not wanted as it gets uglier every day…. I want to find the song of which I dont know all the lyrics or artist. I leave the eraser on the counter (again without knowing I was even carrying it to begin with) I open the fridge to get a drink, then I stand there with the fridge door open staring into the fridge thinking about the last conversation I had with the friend who gave me the stuffed animal. It’s like the “understeering” example but with a twist. I can so relate to everyone who has posted here ! School ? Finally, when “emergency mode” hits and I am able to hyperfocus on the thing that has to be finished, everything else I need to do “flies away” just like the balloons in the picture shared above (and I drop the ball on them). And been treated with SSRI medications on and off for years. While on route I was tapping my feet to one of my favorite tunes that I never learned a lyric or even a chorus to… Yes, this is a great explanation and no I can not explain why I changed the light bulb instead of putting out the fire. Currently 840 PM. But for some reason, It felt like i didn’t even take meds that day. It’s not being able to time things correctly or even realize how much time has passed. I am awaiting my assessment. Give us hope. It’s super helpful. Those ways include fidget toys that are quiet, as not to bother those around me, and exercise before I get ready for the day and before I go to bed. I know people that have told me about ADHD and how I might possibly have it, but I’ve never looked for help. It provides useful solutions and you work together so well its effortless you look up and hours have passed and youve done great things. It gets to a point where I literally cannot hear people or make meaningful connections, and it is so incredibly frustrating. Unless hyperfocused on a task, I honestly don’t know what I am thinking or feeling; I’m simply functioning on auto pilot. Sometimes I can swerve just before I hit the wall, and sometimes I break right through; I take damage every time, but I’m always continuing on. It’s realizing when people look at you weird that either you said something awkwardly or strange. It sucks to me. Ive cashed out 3 retirement funds to keep me affloat between jobs. When I am overwhelmed by noises, stimuli or people, I lay down and clear my brain. Suddenly that’s the ONLY thing on the whiteboard that matters, and until I manage to drag myself back to some semblance of focus, nothing else written beneath it with look like anything more than squiggly lines. It’s being confused all the time. Crippling. On the days I am “locked out,” I am a super extroverted, crazy chatterbox, and find it really hard to slow down. I wanna know what turns you on (I wanna know) So I can be all that and more (And I'd like to know) I'd like to know what makes you cry (Oh yea) So I can be the one who always makes you smile. In high school, and currently in my adult life, it’s much like the commentor who was constantly looking for something, keys, homework, glasses, wallet, headphones, etc. Its like a motor in my head I cannot turn off. Several of those brief moments, strung loosely together is the only way I ever get ANYTHING done. It’s incredibly frustrating because it doesn’t seem to matter how interesting I find something – if it requires extended focus (like reading an article) I just can’t get through it. Usually I will have a minute of relief that my mind can finally rest. I constantly feel like I’m lazy, and wonder why most simple tasks that people do on a daily basis are so overwhelming for me. Wow, could someone be more lame?! Outside the house, there are people to chat with, places to go and things to do. Be it nicotine. I was diagnosed with ADHD in the 2nd grade and school has always been a struggle. It’s trying not to feel sorry for yourself or lose empathy for others when their problems seem like nothing compared to yours if they only knew. I always had physical labor jobs so that I was always doing something, anything! I found it!! Yet still, no one fully understands what we go through…. Sometimes I can’t sit still for 5 minutes. I had so much trouble focusing in school. For me it’s like being on a merry go round. I don’t really read things like this all that much but hearing other peoples stories really got me thinking about what it feels like for me. Now I’m angry I can’t I can’t think, frustrated, and ready to explode. But you know, it’s not always that simple. You’re stressed out of your mind. And mundane and repetitve tasks bore me alot. I’m almost 40 and completely dependant financially on my parents. Just find something you’re compassionate about and holding down that job won’t be hard. “Normal” people can leave the house, talk to neighbors, and shop for groceries at normal intervals, then return home and enjoy a coffee in the evening. No I desperately desire the safety of my sanctuary, but I am locked out. For me it’s Led Zeppelin. If I get off course I feel like eventually I’ll be back on track. [Verse] G D G D A win - dow breaks down a long dark street, C G D And a siren wails in the night. Otherwise, it’s brutal. 1 Speculation 2 Lyrics 3 Credits 4 Covers The song's lyrics detailing a secret relationship have caused much fan speculation about whether the song is referencing Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson possibly being a closeted couple. It’s wanting to be helpful but afraid so therefore just choosing to freeze and be paralyzed. Diagnosed with depression and anxiety. My landlady is a psych nurse she said to me you have ADHD would you mind taking a test to prove it? And now you’re in a different world, with no memory of this one, until tapped on the shoulder or something loud happens. (Most of my university marks were As though.) Then I’m over it and forgive until the next time and the chicken continues. The adrenaline gave me focus. I know it feels like the biggest deal in the world, but trust me …. My mind and my body is running so much all day that when my head hits the pillow, I’m out in less than 3 min. I didn’t read all this post because my mind won’t allow it. In his response he talks about how, with his ADHD, he resolved to simply doing things a little different, and lists a few examples. Both our bodys seems to really work well with one called Vyvanse. There are layers upon layers of abstraction within us. * What do you mean there’s an ice rink instead of a track? As eating a few hours ago, so much has happened in that space of time. But you keep trying to power through it. One subject inadvertently leads to a thought which excites and drives me to jump to a completely different topic, and it is awesome! Sometimes I’m carrying one specific thing in my hand and I forget it’s in my hand so I look around my house for 5 minutes until realize it was in my hand the whole time. It has been hard being mistaken my entire life, wishing we had known this a long time ago. The cacophony of these loops finally sinks me down into an inexplicable fog of exhaustion. She handed me the paper and a pen I looked at the test immediately I felt overwhelmed and my mind started racing. If I don’t write my idea down. No big deal though…I’ll just re wash them & dry them this evening… Just like I was normal or something. Keep it short keep it focused keep it short focused… What? That smell? I want to know about everything. I can’t seem to separate them and do them one by one, it’s difficult to find a place to start when there are so many. In a way I feel like living with ADHD is like living inside a slot machine. My ex used to get mad and call me lazy because i forgot to mow the grass or fix that thing i forgot even needed fixing a week ago. 4. On the outside it seems like I’m just bouncing around aimlessly but in my mind I’m always moving and that’s what matters. Accomplishments- I’m accomplished and chose a complex, fast paced profession because I am most successful when there are “fire drills,” chaos and extreme deadlines. I feel immature for 36. Like today, I went to try to work on my science notes, (we take notes directly from the book), and I had an hour. My work, my kids, my relationships with people. Quite often after snoozing a fourth alarm clock (if I actually rested for more than 4 hours) OR quite often after turning an alarm off prematurely (nights when you toss/turn & feel suffocated from random thoughts/emotions) I’ll start my day. And how do you get a work-life balance. And if it’s a bad day, it could get worse. It is absolutely torture. The worst thing about ADHD is that nobody takes the time to really understand it. P.S. And it feels like... [Repeat until the end:] (Just like a prayer, I'll take you there It's like a dream to me) [2x] When you call my name it's like a little prayer I'm down on my knees, I wanna take you there In the midnight hour I can feel your power Just like a prayer You know I'll take you there I literally feel different than everybody else, I feel like I’m paying attention way too much… but then I’m missing everything at the same time. If you think seh mi boss god a go plus me And that last sentence exactly explains anytime I go out. It had a modest goal $15,000, but then it exploded, and by the the end, it had amassed over $6,000,000 of support!